birddogs shorts

With an Ad Full of Crotch Grabs and Bare Butts, This Line of Shorts Is Clearly Thirsty for Gay Dollars

Birddogs Shorts is a company that sells “gym shorts for free balling crotch crusaders” (their words, not ours), and their Facebook ads deliberately target gay men — not just with user demographics but also with one ultra-thirsty and weirdly homoerotic Birddogs ad that shows a guy repeatedly adjusting his dick, bending over in a G-string and fratty bros trying to strip him naked in public.

The video is billed as an “infomercial” and starts with a scruffy blonde dude playing video games, legs wide open, shorts riding up his untanned thighs, and the narrator asking, “Tired of underwear bunching up your boys?”

The man then angrily puts down his controller and yells while adjusting his genitals and then motions towards his crotch in a sort of dual-handed John Cena WWE “suck it” gesture. The camera then goes in for a black-and-white close-up of his crotch — you know, in case you missed it the first time.

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To be clear, Birddogs sells shorts with a sort of athletic boxer-brief already sewn in, so you can wear them without undies. Thus, this ad highlights the inconveniences of wearing undies or going commando in other shorts.


Here’s the weirdly homoerotic Birddogs ad:

In one scene, the same blondie reads a book while standing in a park, and a bearded bro pulls down his shorts to reveal the man’s grey briefs. In the next scene, the blonde guy wears a baggy shirt, nude from the waist-down. When he rises from the couch and victoriously raises his hands, his friends see that he’s bottomless. One looks away in disgust but the other peers into the black box covering his friend’s genitals and buttcheeks — transfixed by whatever he sees there, as if the man had a tattoo of a unicorn making out with Patrick Swayze.

Once blondie finally relents and buys a pair of Birddogs shorts, he then bends over to drink from a fountain in public, and another bearded dude pulls down his pants. But the prankster soon finds himself staring at his target’s bare butt and testicles (because Birddogs shorts don’t require undies, remember). Water dripping from his mouth, the blonde man looks back and coquettishly smiles.

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Weirdly, the video’s sensibility — its attempts to humiliate a sensitive book-lover in public, its close-ups on crotch-grabbing and its feigned disgust or bewilderment at male butts — all read as definitively straight. This isn’t a gay ad. It’s an ad for gay men obviously created by straight men.

It doesn’t make us want to buy $60 Birddogs shorts, but we do enjoy looking at the blonde dude in the ad. So there’s that.