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Back in the ’70s, Coca-Cola sold us sugary overpriced soda water with Mad Men jingles promising to “teach the world to sing in perfect harmony.” Nearly half a century later, the world ain’t singing in perfect harmony, so they’ve ditched that and chosen a new advertising tack — hot, muscular gay lust.
That’s right. Coca-Cola knows what you want, and it isn’t a bunch of feel-good hippies singing on top of a grassy hill — it’s a gay brother and his sister trampling each other to give a soda to their shredded, scruffy pool man because it’s summer and the siblings are thirsty as fugg.
Watch the video below:
Note that the gay brother in the commercial is wearing a red handkerchief in his right pocket which, according to the gay hankie code, means he’s a fisting bottom — he needs a lot more than a Coke.
The ad is part of Coca-Cola’s new world campaign which features four new video ads about “bridging the extremes of the social divide … in a subtle way,” according to Rodolfo Echeverria, Global Vice President of Creative and Connections (which is apparently an actual role at Coca-Cola). The ads all feature little to no dialogue, though one wonders whether this gay ad will get any play on U.S. networks.
It’s also worth mentioning that in 2014, Coca-Cola actually unveiled what was called the first-ever gay couple in a Super Bowl ad. The ad was of the “teach the world to sing” variety with singers crooning “America The Beautiful” in different languages over scenes of multiculturalism. The gay dads skating with their daughter at a roller rink appeared at 0:47 in the video below.