Over the holiday weekend, comedian Cameron Esposito gave us a treat. She posted her neighbors’ gay nativity scene on Twitter, and it’s pretty amazing.
Our neighbors’ two Joseph nativity is up & I’m beaming 🎄👬 pic.twitter.com/7OKbFLU7v1
— Cameron Esposito (@cameronesposito) November 24, 2017
Honestly, there’s nothing about this we don’t love. The pink robes worn by Joseph and Joseph, the candy cane edging and the peaceful sheep looking on. And we’re not the only ones who loved this. The pic went viral and we’re living for some of the commentary.
Here come the three wise men. Now it's a party
— John Schember (@bigschembo) November 25, 2017
Here's my gaytivity scene with 2 Marys. ❤️ pic.twitter.com/J8itjUCOgr
— Mrs Lady (@Rogue_MrsLady) November 26, 2017
Partial cast of Three Men and a Baby reboot.
— Kimberly A. Callahan (@kac044) November 25, 2017
And, of course, we dig the couple of people who took faux-umbrage:
That's just not right… But then again you can't really put real straw in an uncovered manger without it blowing away, so I see why they'd have to leave it bare.
— Domesticated by Hyenas (@cuprohastes) November 26, 2017
That's just wrong.
The baby isn't supposed to be seen until after midnight, Christmas Eve.
— Karen Springer🗽🇵🇷 (@SpringerKM) November 25, 2017
It’s worth noting too that the two-dad nativity isn’t too far off from canon. After all, the Bible says Jesus Christ had two dads. Sure, they meant Joseph and Yahweh, not two Josephs, but we’re not picky.
And, well, look at Jesus’ story — it’s pretty gay. After all, he convinced 12 different dudes to leave their wives and follow him everywhere. He’s also a “confirmed bachelor,” if you know what we mean. And finally, we’d like to point out that Judas and Jesus totally kissed.
Okay, okay, we’re being silly with that. But there are a number of reports that the historical Jesus Christ may have been an openly gay man — for real. In 2011, a flash flood revealed a cave buried for 2,000 years in Jordan. The cave contained over 70 books and scriptures from the earliest days of Christianity. The books also went into more depth about Jesus’ life. According to The Guardian:
He and his disciples formed a same-sex coterie, bound by feelings of love and mutual support. There are recorded instances of same-sex activity – the “beloved disciple” plays a significant role – and there is affirmation of the joys of friendship and of living and loving together. […]
There is at least one new parable, that of the two young men. There are clear echoes of the relationship between David and Jonathan, for Jesus speaks of one young man having his soul “knit with the soul” of the other, and loving him “as his own soul”. Intriguing is evidence that the Catholics might be closer to the truth about the status of Mary, the mother of Jesus, than are the Protestants. She has a much bigger role in the life of Jesus than many hitherto expected, with Jesus frequently returning home and making much of her.
Conversely, there is at least one incident when Jesus quarrels violently with Joseph, who shows great hostility and makes wild claims about “manliness”. Before, one might have thought that, given Mary’s virginity, Joseph’s attitude was reflecting the ambiguities of his status in the family; but now it seems more probable that we have here a classic example of the Freudian triangle: over-possessive mother, hostile father, gay son.