We Love This Idea For A Queer-Themed “Hell House”

We Love This Idea For A Queer-Themed “Hell House”

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For the last 25 years, Trinity Church in Cedar Hill, Texas has put on a Hell House — a Pentecostal Christian haunted house that portrays the horrors of abortion, homosexuality, drug-use, heavy metal music, etc. In 2001, director George Ratliff made a documentary about it (you can view the trailer here).

During Ratliff’s interview with NPR, he revealed that Trinity uses the event as a massive membership drive: they ask tens of thousands of visitors to convert to Christianity and join their church in the Hell House’s final room. The Hell House has also had a room where a gay man dies of AIDS — he laments his “lifestyle” while a demon mocks him. It’s an all too common type of “Christian” homophobia that makes queer kids believe they’re evil and better off dead than infected with AIDS and burning in hell.

So in light of this gross propaganda, we’re proposing a queer alternative called “Heaven House” that depicts the horrors of Christianity! Here’s some of the frightening rooms our Heaven House would include:

An ex-gay therapist’s room: queer kids strapped down, being electrocuted and made to vomit while viewing innocuous pictures of men and women being affectionate.

A Bishop’s boudoir: old priests and nuns get ready to gang-bang a prepubescent Latino boy with all manner of religious implements.

A Westboro Baptist funeral: the “God Hates Fags” family smiling around the open coffin of a queer girl — her face horribly bashed in.

An exorcism room: conservative shirt-and-tie folks hold down a scared kid as a preacher approaches him with hot iron cross and a water bucket — funnel and hose attached.

In the last room, a bunch of queers in shiny clothes and colored hair tell you, “There is a way out! You don’t have to go to heaven, y’know. Would you like to be saved?” and invite you to a badass dance party where you can be queer without feeling all shitty about it.

Who’s in for the Heaven House? Let’s make it happen!


Featured image by Art-of-Stock via iStock. Previously published October 8, 2015.

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