People Everywhere Are Rejoicing the Almighty Hammaconda’s Return
Rejoice, rejoice and be exceedingly glad: Jon Hamm’s penis has returned! Hammaconda is back and it is back with a vengeance.
The most recent sighting of Jon Hamm’s penis was in the Los Felices neighborhood of Los Angeles, California, where he reportedly purchased a $3.4 million mansion. Trying to be incognito in a ball cap and sunglasses, the 46-year-old actor was out and about in a pair of khakis.
This is us:
People on Twitter are here for it too:
Me @ Jon Hamm. pic.twitter.com/QuO0lisL0Y
— Kevin (@spicykezzinnugg) May 9, 2017
Dear God, thank you for Jon Hamm. #blessed
— robinski (@RobinskiSB55) May 9, 2017
This isn’t the first time Jon Hamm’s penis has made headlines.
The outline of Hammaconda is used to all the press.
In 2012, Jon Hamm’s penis went on a shopping trip to Barneys in New York, accompanied by Hamm and his then girlfriend Jennifer Westfeldt. Wesfeldt is the star of the queer cult classic Kissing Jessica Stein, one of my personal favorite gay films. They broke up in 2015.
What does Hamm think about the hung hullabaloo?
Historically, Hamm isn’t a fan of the attention that seems to surround his crotch, understandably. In 2013, he told Rolling Stone, “Most of it’s tongue-in-cheek. But it is a little rude.”
Hamm continues: “They’re called ‘privates’ for a reason. I’m wearing pants, for fuck’s sake. Lay off. I mean, it’s not like I’m a fucking lead miner. There are harder jobs in the world. But when people feel the freedom to create Tumblr accounts about my cock, I feel like that wasn’t part of the deal. But whatever. I guess it’s better than being called out for the opposite.”
Hamm was also unimpressed when the topic came up in a 2014 interview with Men’s Fitness magazine.
“Would you want people walking up to you and pointing at your dick?” he asked. “I can’t believe I’m still talking about this. But I’ve worn underwear every day of my life and the fact that I’m painted as this exhibitionist is a little annoying.”
However, it look’s like Hamm is over all the hubbub about his giant member. In a more recent interview with GQ, he said, “It was a topic of fascination for other people — certainly not me. By the way, as rumors go — not the worst.”