A recent Taiwanese study showed that men with erectile dysfunction (aka trouble getting boners) were 79 percent more likely to have chronic periodontitis (aka ass-mouth). Actually, chronic periodontitis is an oral disease caused by a buildup of plaque under the gum line. If you don’t regularly brush or floss, all the food and dicks you eat leave a plaque residue that gradually builds up and hardens under the gumline as a hard, stinky substance called calculus. As the calculus grows in size, it begins pulling your gums away from your teeth. Since your gums help anchor your teeth and keep them healthy, when they’re pulled away, your teeth become loose and food can start collecting and rotting in the pockets between your teeth and gums, causing some seriously nasty poo-breath; loss of teeth; inflamed, bleeding gums; nasty infections; and (apparently) as loss of boners. Dr. Larry Lipshultz with Men’s Health’s explains how a bad mouth wreaks havoc down south: “Chronic inflammation caused by gum disease may damage your endothelial cells, which form the lining on all of your blood vessels, including those in your penis. The endothelial damage can result in impaired blood flow, leaving you limp in the sack.” We already knew that bad oral hygiene could kill other people’s boners, but your own? Oh hell no. Luckily, all you have to do to stop periodontitis from killing your cock is brush and floss for two minutes a day and get a few deep dental cleanings or tooth extractions if you’re already in its mild opening stages. You could also just replace all your teeth with bling, but you’d still have to sanitize them. Diamonds and jewels need love too.
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