Undecided Voter? Madonna Will Blow You To Vote Hillary!

Undecided Voter? Madonna Will Blow You To Vote Hillary!

Be first to like this.
Translate this Story and earn Hornet Points!

It’s hard to imagine that anyone’s still an undecided voter, but hey — last week, Ken Bone got famous for being one. But if there’s something that’s going to push anyone off the fence, it’s probably this:

That’s right — if you vote for Hillary, Madonna will give you a blow job. She made the claim while opening for Amy Schumer at Madison Square Garden. Given that Madonna wrote the book on Sex, you probably know that she knows what she’s doing… but, of course, if you’re not sure between Hillary and Trump, you might not be hitting on all cylinders — so let her convince you:

If you vote for Hillary Clinton, I will give you a blow job, okay? You know I’m good. I’m good. I’m not a douche, and I’m not a tool. I take my time. I have a lot of eye contact. Yeah, and I do swallow.

We think this might be enough to sway most hardcore Trump fans too — if nothing else, wouldn’t voting for Hillary be worth it for the story of your night with Madonna?

Related Stories

5 Projects That Made a Star of Tom Holland, the Guy We're Swooning Over This Week
How Do You Tell If He's Too Young or Old for You?
This Is How I Lost My Virginity on an Evangelical Christian Mission Trip
Remember That Time Luigi Was Said to Be Promoting Lesbianism in a Video Game?