trump staffers teaser
trump staffers teaser

Trump’s Millennial Staffers Are Complaining That No One Wants to Date Them

After interviewing 30 current and former millennial staffers of U.S. President Donald Trump, Politico discovered that Trump staffers’ dating lives suck. Young members of the Trump administration get heckled on the street, lots of people regularly flip them the bird as they leave work and no one wants to date them, possibly because they support a racist, misogynist, know-nothing totalitarian wannabe — imagine that.

While any new presidential administration brings with it a new entourage of staffers and lobbyists to Washington, D.C., Politico states, “If you work for Trump, it’s also hostile territory” — hardly surprising seeing as only 4% of D.C. voted for Trump. Trump also likes to characterize predominantly black urban neighborhoods like D.C. as crime-ridden hellholes (perfect for his brand of preferred brand of rough policing), so it’s no wonder the city hasn’t warmed to his supporters.

As such, Trump’s support team is much smaller than that of the last three presidents. They prefer smaller apartment gatherings to taking over bars and throwing big house parties. And they’ve mostly cloistered around the city’s Waterfront and Navy Yard neighborhoods — an area full of “yuppies, tourists and affluent empty-nesters visiting from the suburbs … stocked with brand-new boutiques and restaurants, as well as chains” — leaving a much smaller influence on the city’s cultural landscape.

Trump staffers' dating 04
A map of where support staff of the last few administrations have lived in Washington D.C., image via Politico

Trump staffers’ dating lives are beleaguered by outrage. Many dating profiles tell Trump voters and staffers not to even bother trying.

Some pro-Trumpers just lie about where they work and who they voted for — though Googling someone’s name can often reveal the truth. If they’re honest, people will ask “HOW COULD YOU BE SUCH A RACIST AND A BIGOT?” or “Do you rip babies from their mothers and then send them to Mexico?” (Both entirely fair questions.)

But there’s an upside for these horrid people Trump staffers. They’ve found, as Politico says, “In Washington — even in Trump’s Washington — as long as you have power, you can manage to feel popular somewhere.”

What do you think of Trump staffers’ dating lives? Would you date a Trump staffer?