Creating the perfect dating app bio is no easy feat. If it was, we’d all have dates lined up for the next year, or even better, a boyfriend. (Or if you’re polyamorous, boyfriends.) It’s difficult to find the perfect balance between clever and bitchy, intellectual and snob, and thirsty while also looking for Mr. Right.
Bios are important. If we’re being 100% honest, they’re maybe not as important as the profile picture (we gays are very visual), but after you’ve cleared the first hurdle by mastering the perfect profile pic (don’t worry, we’ve covered the topic right over here), you need to have a compelling bio. One that makes you stand out from all the other gorgeous men out there.
So here are five components to creating the perfect dating app bio.
1. Don’t come off as bitchy or ‘over-it.’
Dating can be a pain in the ass. We all know it. So there’s no reason to waste what few, precious words you’re allowed to write in your dating app bio by stating “no flakes,” “don’t waste my time” or “don’t message me without a picture.” It’s off-putting and hostile. And guess what? No one likes their time wasted, obviously, and saying as much doesn’t deter people anyway. You want to avoid sounding jaded and annoyed, which makes it less likely for someone who isn’t a time-waster to reach out, even if he’s attracted to your profile pic.
2. Write what it is you’re looking for.
Are you looking for casual hookups on the way to finding a boyfriend? Say that! Are you only interested in dates? Are you only interested in sex? Are you only looking for friends? (Well, first, ask yourself truthfully if that’s the case, and if it actually is, then yes, say that!) Write exactly what you’re looking for out of a man and a relationship.
3. Don’t be racist, femmephobic, fat-shaming or a jerk.
I mean, this should be somewhat obvious, but given the number of profiles bearing the words “no blacks,” “no Asians” and “no fats,” maybe it’s not as obvious as we thought. (Though you won’t find profiles that say those things on Hornet, as we don’t allow that kind of gross ignorance.) If you’re not interested in a certain race or body type, keep that to yourself, alright? Don’t be a jerk.
4. Share a few words that describe your personality.
Don’t go into a full pageant answer — “I enjoy long walks on beach, with my toes in the sand, right as the sun sets on the horizon” — that’s a bit much. But saying a few words like “goofy gamer,” “outdoorsy” or “queer artist” (better yet, set those up as hashtags on your Hornet profile) gives us a better sense to the type of person you really are as well as your interests.
5. Be witty and funny if that’s your cup of tea.
We love humor. Like, queer people are hands down the funniest people on the internet. Have you seen Gay Twitter? If you can be funny, do it. It helps you stand out. My best friend, who’s actually straight, writes on his Tinder bio, “Not looking for anything serious. Just a house in the suburbs and a couple of kids.” That’s funny! (Imagine in Michelle Visage voice.)